More FAQ’s
Posted on 18. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
Do Dog Condoms™ really work? Do human condoms work? Do dishwashing gloves keep you from getting dishpan hands? Is prayer effective? As sure as a bucket stops the rain from dripping on your kitchen floor, our patent pending Dog Condom™ is sure to collect all the fluids for which it is designed, assuming proper application [...]
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Why Choose Dog Condoms
Posted on 18. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
Even PETA will tell you plainly that mutilating your pet is wrong. Whether it’s cropping the ears, clipping the tail, or declawing your ferocious feline; putting your prized pet under the knife to suit your humanly purposes is austerely inhumane. So with that obvious knowledge in your quiver, why would you even dream of getting [...]
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How to apply Dog Condoms
Posted on 18. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
Using the following illustrations as a guide, consider these as the best method for the application of your dog’s patent pending Dog Condom™. There are a few different “right ways” to apply it, but many more “wrong ways”, and it’s our goal to help you keep that red rocket firing straight ahead. After all, when [...]
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No Animal Testing
Posted on 18. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
As an earth-friendly, green company, we adhere to a steadfast commitment to never test our products on any animals of any kind. All of our products are 100% inorganic, and have NEVER been tested on any animals, or any member of the animal kingdom, except for well-informed, willing, well-compensated humans.
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Vibra-Teddy Bear
Posted on 02. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
As a human being, it’s certain you remember the first time you transitioned from items of self gratification that were inanimate into the wonderful world of semi-automiatic. The Vibra-Teddy™ is no different. This clever little bear is voice activated, but not to your voice, to his barking. This stuffed, plush cuddly will wiggle and jiggle [...]
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Doggy Dental Dams™
Posted on 02. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
This product is still at least a year from market-ready. We’ve encountered a number of developmental problems along the way, the most obvious of which being the fact that a dog’s mouth is up to 8” long and 3” wide, effectively making the dental dam about the size of a toddler’s rain slicker without the [...]
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Flavoured Condoms
Posted on 02. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
We are still running our beta products through a series of test with the USDA right now, but we expect to have flavored condoms available within the next few months. If you’re a human being, you surely must know how flavored condoms can take a sniffing experience to a whole new level. Flavored Dog Condoms™ [...]
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Self-Gratifying Legs
Posted on 02. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
If you haven’t yet found the perfect partner for your beloved poodle, all hope is not lost, and your baby doesn’t have to resent you for your patience. We have a modest variety of simulated lovers available for your household companion as presented in the perennial favorite form of the humpable human leg. There’s no [...]
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FiDilDo- Dog
Posted on 02. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
You may not know what your beloved pooch is hungry for, but if you’re not willing to accept the limited risks associated with extra-canine intercourse, you can put your faith in the Dog Condoms engineers to find just the sort of “ruff sex” your boy is after. Our patent pending love buddy, the Fidildog™, is [...]
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Dog Condoms
Posted on 02. Jan, 2011 by Dog Condoms.
Our researchers have spent more than six-years developing a full range of human-tested, canine-adapted prophylactics, toys and tools specifically to aid your dog in an assortment of traditional sex acts, without the need to have been neutered, in order to ensure that he will not become the father of an unexpected litter of orphan pups. [...]
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